ToMichaelFromMom

There You'll Be

(Diane Warren)

When I think back on these times

And the dreams we left behind

I'll be glad 'cause I was blessed

To get to have you in my life

When I think back on these days

I'll look and see your face

You were right there for me

In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky

In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life

I'll keep a part of you with me

And everywhere I am there you'll be

Well, you showed me how it feels

To have the sky within my reach

And I always will remember all the strength you gave to me

Your love made me make it through

Oh, I owe so much to you

You were right there for me

In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky

In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life

I'll keep a part of you with me

And everywhere I am there you'll be

Cause I always saw in you my life, my strength

And I want to thank you now for all the ways

You were right there for me

Always

In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky

In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life

I'll keep a part of you with me

And everywhere I am there you'll be

There you'll be

Dear Michael,

Heaven must be such a beautiful place...

I know this is true because here on earth used to be a beautiful place, when you were here with me.

I miss you so badly Michael....

Life is so hard without you here....

Somedays I wonder if I will be able to survive,

The pain that I feel is something so deep and so intense, that words cannot begin to describe what I am feeling.

Sometimes I wonder if a person can die from a broken heart...

But I go on, I know my place is here on earth, for now...

Someday, when god is ready for me,

I know that I will see that beautiful face of yours again...

I know you will be waiting on the other side for me to join you.

Knowing this is what keeps me going.

I feel you here with me sometimes,

I know you are by my side.

Death can take your body,

but death cannot take your spirit

or your memory away from me...

I Love you with all my heart and soul baby...

Watch over us all until the day we are all together again...

Love always and Forever,

Mom

Walking Through Life Without You

Here it is, another year, and you aren't with me.

It seems like yesterday and so long ago that you walked beside me.

I didn't realize what life would be like without you.

The first year after you died, I was like a zombie.

I didn't notice anything except the pain.

I could still see your face, every scar, every strand of your hair.

I cried ceaselessly, and prayed angrily.

I didn't think I could continue to exist that first year.

Then, as time went by, I laughed the empty laughter of grief.

I forced my face into a smile.

I would nod politely, as friends and family told me

it was time to let go and move on.

I even came to understand their seemingly lack of compassion.

I could quote to you all the textbook terminology about grief.

I could explain every phrase, every step of the grief process.

I have become an expert on grief.

I learned how to read people, who I could reminisce

with, who I could express my anger to,

and who I needed to hide my feelings from.

Now, I am at that junction in my you-less life,

when my grief is my warm mantel in winter;

when my thoughts of you are no less frequent

but they don't prevent me from functioning;

and, when I think I see you on the street, I don't drive around the block.

I know you are gone, and I know that I

have to walk through this life without you.

What I have decided to do with that knowledge

is to live life the best way I can;

because someday, I will join you and I want you to be proud of me.

So, if I do good things with my life; if I laugh,

if I forgive and if I have compassion,

don't ever think that I have forgotten or that I have stopped missing you.

If I walk through life without you,

in a good way,

then I do it to honor you.

FROM YOUR GRANDMA AND YOUR MOTHER